Dear grandbabies loved and grandbaby disappointments,
Your grandmas are doing four shows in the Cinder Block Comedy Festival this coming weekend. If memory serves, it's the same annual church basement potluck where your parents met. But please do not bring anything. Our family isn't allowed to bring a dish anymore since the time Aunt May used upholstery cleaner instead of spray butter on the rolls. But don't worry, Grandma is still going to sneak in the JELLO you love so much. We've just got to keep that jiggle on the low.
Get your tickets below:
Educated Guess Rough Trade Thur 9/7 8:00-10:00pm There will be a science fair and a comedy show hosted by Jo Firestone and Steven DeSiena then your Fantasy Grandmas Jane B and Sylvie C are doing a few songs about Jesus, wombs and space to spark up the afterparty! $15! Buy tickets here!
FANTASY GRANDMA LIVE! Precious Metal Fri 9/8 8:30-9:15pm Fantasy Grandmas Jane B and Sylvie C are doing a full evening of songs and LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT BINGO for your love and enjoyment. Bring a safe place to put your checks for college. $5! Buy tickets here!
The Brunch! Bar Matchless Sat 9/9 2:30-4:30pm Jane B is gonna sing songs about sex and breakfast. Banish your hangover shame with grandma's love and a plate of Jane's sticky icky wake and bake JELLO. Info here!
Comedy Quick Change El Cortez Sun 9/10 7:00-9:00pm See Jane B and one of your drag queen cousins switch places. Get ready to meet your Fantasy Grandpa. $5! Buy tickets here!
You haven't seen your grandmas in such a long time.
Did you even know you have a new one?
Sylvie C is your new grandma. She can't drive either. Or use a smart phone. Did you help us drive the car or take this picture?
And watch the teaser for "Cooking with Kristin and Fantasy Grandma, Episode JELLO" COMING SOON!
Are you coming to see us on June 28th at Ars Nova?
Did you buy your ticket yet?
If you buy your ticket today, June 1st, we'll send you an mp3 of your Grandmas telling you the Grimm's version of the Little Mermaid story. You can listen to it before you go to sleep and be grateful things aren't as bad as they used to be.
We used to all have to sell our hair to get rid of our tails. That's just the truth of how it was.
We love you. Here's Jane B with our promotional rubbers.
Love, Fantasy Grandma
P.S. Did you buy your ticket yet?
P. P. S. Here's a preview for our Jello cooking show with our granddaughter Kristin.